My heart is yours [Forever]

I know this may be redundant
But I think it bares repeating
I think I've found my other half
I swear I've found my better half

Why I love you is a hard question to answer. I love you because you care for me like no one else I know. I love the way I feel in your arms, so safe from all the dangers in the world. I love your eyes, so hypnotic and mesmerizing, beautiful to gaze into, and yet never revealing everything to me. I can't explain every way that I love you because that's impossible. But I can say that I love you because you are you.

I say fall head over heels, find someone you can love like crazy & who will love you the same way back

You cant be me Im a rockstar

I don't wanna be your whole world, I just wanna be your favorite part

all you have to do in life is
go out with your friends, party, have fun,
and look twice as good as the bitch standing next to you

Everythings been upsetting lately. And tonight it just all flashed before my eyes and I just brokedown. like completly i couldnt stop crying and i just lost control. I had a good talk with my mom. Ive decided im not going to college instead im going to become a cosmotolegist and go to a beauty school because thats what i love to do. its just where my heart is right now. me and mike are at rough point right now and its hurting me alot. its not us its evryone else. well get through it. I miss my dad so much i feel so lost without knowing. its hurts so bad. and i cant stop crying. i havent stopped in the past like 4 hours. its hard. case is really helping me he actually is listening and understanding and it really makes me feel better it does. I wish i could just call renee because i miss her so bad and i just need to vent but i dont want to put this on her. i swore i wouldnt do this but its killing me inside.

Look for the girl with the broken smile...

I am your daughter hiding my depression. I am your little sister making a good impression. I am your friend acting like I'm fine. I am a teenager pushing her tears aside. I am the girl sitting next to you. I am the one asking you to care. I am your best friend hoping you'll be there.

i know it hurts. but it's life, and it's .r.e.a.l. and sometimes it fucking hurts, but it's life, and it's pretty much all we've got.

I'm half alive but I feel mostly (dead)
I try and tell myself it'll be all right
I just shouldn't think anymore tonight

40 questions about 2005.

1) Was 2005 a good year for you? Umm. Yeah it was a really fun year alot better then 2004, a whole lot

2) What was your favorite moment of the year? Umm november 19th, homecoming, or sadies and all kaylas parties

3) What was your least favorite moment of the year? Proubably... umm... well once me and renee stopped being best friend kinda sucks

4) Where were you when 2005 began? Hmm... i cant think of it i dont think i even watched the ball drop! but i think i was with haley

5) Who were you with? haley i think, wow i cannot even think so i mustve been drunk

6) Where will you be when 2005 ends? with mike!

7) Who will you be with when 2005 ends? Mike!

8) Did you keep your new years resolution of 2005? yeah right

10) Did you fall in love in 2005? yes i did =)

11) If yes, with who? Michael Alan Schultz

12) If yes, do they know? yes they do very much

13) Are you still in love with them? yes of course im very in love with him

14) Do you regret it? nooo way

15) Did you breakup with anyone in 2005? umm nope

16) Did you make any new friends in 2005? yes lots

17) Who are your favorite new friends? tiana, alyssa and whitney

18) What was your favorite month of 2005? hmm.. proubably august since it was warm but i still met alyssa and tiana and whitney and i love them all and i met my love!

19) Did you travel outside of the US in 2005? nope

20) How many different states did you travel to in 2005? umm.. jeesh like 6-7

21) Did you lose anybody close to you in 2005? no thank god

22) Did you miss anybody in the past year? yes i did i missed my dad alot

23) What was your favorite movie that you saw in 2005? red eye or weddin crashers

24) What was your favorite song from 2005? wow.. umm i dont know prolly spill canvas ones

25) What was your favorite record from 2005? one fell swoop or north

26) How many concerts did you see in 2005? umm like 2

27) Did you have a favorite concert in 2005? ashleee simpson

28) Did you drink a lot of alchohol in 2005? oo yes

29) Did you do a lot of drugs in 2005? no

30) How many people did you sleep with in 2005? 1

31) Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year? no wayy

33) What was the worst lie someone told you in 2005? i dont remember

34) Did you treat somebody badly in 2005? prolly

35) Did somebody treat you badly in 2005? yeah

36) How much money did you spend in 2005? alot

37) What was your proudest moment of 2005? i dont know

38) What was your most embarrassing moment of 2005? o dear i have no clue

39) If you could go back in time to any moment of 2005 and change something, what would it be? umm nothiiing

40) What are your plans for 2006? stay with mike forevvvver and ummm lose weight..sooo cliche

review of my week:

Monday- Yuck yuck school. Boyfriends house and rented Kicking and Screaming. Someone fell asleep during it <Guilty> then when i woke up for the 5 minutes i went home (( Felt bad = me ))

Tuesday- Whorrrreable school. went home. talked to mike. watched real world reunion.cried when dannyproposedtomelinda. slept.

Wednesday- Came home. Mike came over around 430 we just chillled. Then he had football and i had dance so we left. came home. watched one tree hill. glamorous. loved it. made me sad. watched gilmore girls then watched the new made with my brother. called mike and went to sleep.

Today- didnt feel good so i went home during 2nd block. slept all day then woke up and mike was playing with my hair  -- god i love that boy --. so chilled around with him. got a piggyback ride to my mailbox. woot woot! then we just sat there cuz i was sick and he was not so there wasnt much to do so we just layed in bed then he went home and i did nothing. only now i have my marshmellow mania fruity pebbles at my side and its wonderfull.

[	mood	|	sleepy	]
[	music	|	The OC soundtrack	]

Well i went to teneesee for thanksgiving it was niice seeing mandi since shes back from iraq and all the rest of my family, i didnt get to see my dad tho since he can only have one vistor a week and my little sister went. that sure did put a downpour on my sunny day = ( anyways i missed mike way to much while i was gone. But when i came home aat 3:45 on sunday morning i called him and talked then we hung out all day sunday and went to hooters and then tried to watch 1 tree hill but it wasnt working , sad, so we just played some games and met briannes boyfriend. they came over and me and mike were having a burping contest, way cool first impression on ur sisters boyfriend, o well. haha. today i just kinda had a down day so after school i came home and picked up my room and then went to mikes house and we did our anderson packet kinda lol and then went and rented kicking and screaming, i fell asleep for like the last hour of it and then slept for like an hour and half, i felt bad.

ps. i hate winter so much

fake is so in;;
&& you're so stylish, babe.

save a balloon,
pop ya collar. <3

& tonight,
no tears will run down
her cheek.
this girl is in love

Thanksgiving/Christmas last year + finding out about my dad = worst day of my life. Its weird looking at pictures and actually being able to tell exactly how i was feeling....hurt

sad...

I miss the ruttys

I miss my little sister alex

I miss the way me and renee used to be

But most of all i miss my dad =(

Im going to miss mike so muuuch when im gone.

cause i believe in holding hands in the
car and kissing at all the red lights ♥

that day i met you ; ill never forget it
i was so unsure ; my life was a bit of a mess
until i looked at you..
it was something in your eyes
something that told me that you were alright
that you were what i needed.

<33333 Rachel

Being a best friend is when you can look into her eyes and pretend to be happy and she just hugs you and you both start crying because you not only see the pain in her you feel it too.

this isn`t any other teenage romance,
no, they`ve grown through it all,
and gained their maturity,
after all of the bumps on this rocky road
they`ve finally reached their desired
destination : love

PREP is the new PiMP
don't go solo, grab a polo
you don't gotta holla
pop your collar

I've got more with, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better fuck

than any girl you'll ever meet. Sweetie you had me. Boy, I was

it. Look past the sweat, a better love deserving of exchanging

body heat in the passenger seat.- Panic at the discooo

&& there's something about you
that makes me fall harder each time

( Fill it out bitches  )